Four stores and several tears ago
I set forth upon a mission
Conceived in ignorance and
Dedicated to the proposition that
All men are created equal
To women.

I then was thus engaged to test
Whether one man - or any man -
So motivated and so dedicated
Can long endure.

"It is altogether fitting and proper,"
I told my wife,
"That I should do this."

And so I ventured out to shop,
My wallet raised on high;
"Bring on sachets and negligees,"
Became my battle cry.

The hours passed, the goods amassed,
My feet began to growl,
And then before the second floor
I just threw in the towel.

"Enough!" I cried, "No more! Desist!
You force me to confess
A woman CAN out-shop a man . . .
I humbly acquiesce!"

The point of view that money talks
Is oddly all awry;
The only time I hear from mine
Is when it yells "buy - buy!"

No matter if or not it speaks,
I can but sit and sigh
And sadly mourn my money as
It blithely waves "bye - bye."

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