I have done a little cookin'
Sometimes it's not half bad
But you never know which half you'll get
That makes me rather sad

The giblet sack stayed up inside
The first turkey I ever cooked
I wouldn't stick my hand up there
I was embarrased to even look

"The pralines are wonderful"
I heard my Daddy cry
I didn't want to tell him
It was really pecan pie!

There were lots more things I messed up
Nothing went according to plan
So the next year I was asked to fix
Cranberry sauce from the can.

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